waco restores my soul

last weekend, ross & i were able to sneak out of town

and bask in the glory that is baylor

during the last weekend of sing.

don't worry that my husband bought tickets literally

the minute they went on sale. he's so "over sing." haha whatever...

we felt very blessed that so many of our friends

made time to hang out with us, drink coffee, eat froyo,

cook 'big brek,' give us a place to sleep (thanks roommate!),

and talk about sing for hours and hours and hours.

in fact, after watching sing for 6 hours,

we went back to sarahs house with a bottle of andre

and talked about sing until 4 in the morning,

just like the good ol' days.

homecoming

dear baylor,

thank you for having your 100th homecoming, and for welcoming me home with blissfully perfect weather for my first time as an alumni. 

dear friends,

thank you for sharing ninfaritas, good talks, baris, and reliving memories.  especially the stories about smiller & jeaux. can't wait to get back to you; you inspire me like nothing else in this world. 

dear smiller, the dude, & wade,

where were you guys this weekend?! o yea, across the oceans living your dreams.  we missed you, and my heart hurt when we drove down 10th street and you weren't there.  but you were alive in every corner & place we went, because you are part of our baylor. 

dear savs,

you made such a beautiful bride! thank you so much for letting ross & i celebrate with you. we're so excited for you! p.s. pat looked crazy handsome in his uniform. 

dear baylor again, 

you are the place where i met ross, fell in love, got engaged & married.  you are the place where i met my best friends, and came alive in a way i never had been before.  you will always be a special, beautiful, irreplaceable home to me.  and if i start to love my new home in college station, thanks in advance for knowing that i'm not replacing you. 

dear ross,

i love you.  thank you for loving me & for being the best husband in the whole world.  

dear blog,

we made it! one whole year! thanks for helping me do something consistently for a whole year. 

a lot has happened- and you caught it all.  here's to another year!

sic 'em

{spring 2007}

a few days ago, i recieved comment on a post inquiring about what it is i love(d) 

about baylor so very, very much (by the way- thanks for asking!).  

though lack of skill & eloquence prevents me from truly putting into words my experience, talking about it is one of my sweetest pleasures. 

i'm currently working on my response,

 and i'll promise to answer you as soon as i can formulate a decent description! 

it's official...

...i am now a member of the real world.
baylor = the best 4 years of my life
{so far}

im graduating?

{via bakerella}

so, in order to make graduation a somewhat happy day, we will be having a fun BBQ with friends & family. in our opinion, graduating is by no means a happy time in life- but we plan on making the best out of the situation and party like were still college kids.

adorable little treats like candy graduation caps would certainly help :)

final final

hey blog,

today is the last time you will be my partner
in procrastinating my studies.
this afternoon i will take my very last final.
and be done with class at Baylor University, officially.
you've helped me get through countless hours
down here in the Moody Computer Lab.
this place can get pretty weird,
(there are no windows)
and i don't know if i could i made it without
the escape you've provided for me...
billions of design, cooking, relationship blogs
for me to sort through.
and above all else, you always let me ramble
about whatever.
i haven't even been able to study for this last final of mine.
it seems too final.

o well. brit lit, here i come...

graduation is coming?

{from here}

graduation is coming.
i never understood why people celebrated on that day.
in fact, i would argue that people have parties
just to cover up the sadness.

one thing is for sure:
baylor bears are blessed beyond belief.
the other day someone told me that my life seemed like a fairy tale.
but the truth is, all of our lives are like fairy tales!
Jesus Christ died for us, forgave us of our sins, and wants to
dance with us in Heaven.
everything else in life is the lagniappe.

and a lucky few of us got to experience
a little bit of heaven on earth here at good ole BU.

study break no. 1

{freakin yum}

peanut butter & chocolate chip brownies.
i have a feeling a study break is in order sometime this week to make these heavenly treats.

i baked a lot this past year. last spring, the gentlemen of kappa sigma asked me to be their sweetheart. this sounds so lame, but it really was one of the best days of my life- and since then, one of the best years. every monday of this school year, i've been able to go to their meetings with tasty treats, funny stories, and silly awards to give out. i would spend hours preparing on sunday evenings, but not matter how much i gave- i always received so much more.

last wednesday i passed on the sweetheart torch. i met the guys on the suspension bridge, and we walked to the middle singing the sweetheart song to another girl. i found myself crying when i got there- sad it was over, that the year had gone by so fast. but once we were on the bridge and i saw her face, i was overcome with joy- remembering how humbled, honored, blessed, loved, overwhelmed, shocked i felt on that bridge one year ago. it was all in her face too.

the best part of the day was all the affirming words the guys gave me. i still can't help tearing up when i think about their kind words, smiles, hugs... ross sent me roses with a card that says, "you'll always be my sweetheart." this is truly so cheesy, but having the joy of being sweetheart taught me a lot about love.

every monday, when i walked into their room i was greeted with an uproar of cheers, yells, guys literally bouncing off the walls- the best feeling in the world. this is how we should always feel when we think about how God delights in us and loves us fully and unconditionally. i like to think that he is overjoyed by the sight of us and wants to encourage us with his cheers of love and encouragement. and, theres no time limit!

as much love and affirmation i experienced through those men this past year, nothing can fill or satisfy me in the the way that God's love can.

i'm looking forward to baking for ross, our new friends, & our future family throughout the rest of my life- but i know whenever i pull out the cookie sheet or brownie pan i'll remember what it was like to bake for those 75+ guys and feel God's love through them every week.

hell week

{from here}

last week was a big week.
one which i look forward to writing about
during an even bigger week:
my last week of class.

it also happens to be, what i like to call,
"hell week."
the library is my new best friend,
coffee runs through my veins,
and the light of day is a distant memory.

it's better this way, really.
the days of this week are relentless waves,
trying to pound me down.
but i'll come out alive.

friends, wedding plans, my bed, happy hour,
i'll see you next week :)

get your pageant on.

tonight was very silly.
i was in the baylor beauties pageant.
found some dresses in my closet. didn't have time to shower after aerobics, but smiller did my makeup.
but... i won!

ahahahaha


i'll miss you Baylor. thanks for always getting to me do things i would neeeeever do anywhere else.

one sunday afternoon in april

these are some of my very best friends,
my community & my tribe.
they just gave me the most wonderful bridal shower
in the whole world!
complete with incredibly yummy cupcakes, baked bree,
mini quiches, and some surprisingly strong refreshments.
there were ridiculously silly games, door prizes,
and a simply good time for all.

thank you so much friends- i feel so loved!
you are soooo incredible!

senoritis

the other day, my friend john confessed:
"i've gotten to the point where i can't do my homework
...unless its due in 7 minutes."

ditto.

procrastinating, again.

one good thing about school work: it ispires me.

inspires me to do what? well, procrastinate obviously.

this morning, in the form of checking out fun blogs & finding things to make next week.

whats more important? finishing a paper

or finding the perfect butterless cake recipe and the perfect easter garland!

i mean, duh...

{from here}

{from here}

back to writing about fireproof. if you haven't seen it,

it's amazing cheesy but really touching. the acting makes you want to hate it,

but you can stop watching or hold back those darn tears.

liminality

my roommate's teacher randomly sends out emails of interesting words. tonight the word was liminality, which wikipedia defines as:

is a psychological, neurological, or metaphysical subjective, conscious state of being on the "threshold" of or between two different existential planes. the liminal state is characterized by ambiguity, openness, and indeterminacy. one's sense of identity dissolves to some extent, bringing about disorientation. liminality is a period of transition where normal limits to thought, self-understanding, and behavior are relaxed - a situation which can lead to new perspectives.

yep, that sounds about right. im standing in the paradoxical threshold. it's horrifying & exhilirating at the same time. my foot is ready to move from one side but not too sure about what lies ahead.

i am sure about one thing though: diamondbacks has a new happy hour special and it is wonderful! we practically took up the whole balcony tonight with friends enjoying martinis & mojitos... and sliders which i of course love because they look like tiny burgers!

wandering thoughts...

{from here}

michelangelo explained that when he carved his infamous masterpieces out of marble that he believed they already existed inside and that he was simply letting them free. i've always felt the same way about writing papers... the paper already exists, i just have to free the words.

anyway, what i'm trying to say is that i believe my silly 7 page paper will write itself eventually. my mind is wandering to sweet and simple delights of the future home i will share with a boy. namely: pretty green, yellow, and blue walls for light to bounce off of & a fluffy cozy bed to never leave on saturday mornings.

journey

i've decided to keep the joy alive of sb2k9
by celebrating the people that were a part of one this sweet time
& the life lessons they taught me somewhere between sunbathing and dancing the night away.
after all, we never have to say goodbye to the people that mean something to us:
they become a part of us and travel in us through this crazy journey called life.

"God has a plan, but you gotta make it happen." - hayden lamb

if you google him, you will find some pretty impressive stuff...he's played in a very successful christian rock band called red, gone to the grammys, been in some rockin' music videos, and there is even an entry about him on wikipedia. but none of that defines him.

he loves Jesus and listens attentively & patiently for his calling. an injury to his shoulder put his drumming career on hold, and even though he is not actively involved in music ministry currently, he is still a light to all that meet him. he is truly humble and would rather listen to someone else's story than share pieces of his own.

hayden rocks a faux-hawk, has a twin brother, lives with some very talented and well known musicians, and wants to be a cowboy. but he didn't even believe us when we said he was cute!
his humility, passion for life, and resilient faith in Christ are truly inspiring.
he encourages me to dream big, trust in God's plan, and actively pursue his will.

dance the night away

104 days until the big day.
i'm too scared to count the number
until graduation.
one thing i know for sure:
we are not guaranteed tomorrow-
so it's time to live it up!

the rest of this semester is officially my
"yesmester"
what to hang out? yes.

miss you, sb2k9.

"i feel like since you've come back you've been a completely different person," he said to me.

i wonder if that's true. i feel different, but maybe it's just a phase. i feel like i accidentally stumbled upon a wardrobe and fell into Narnia. the thing is with Narnia, you can't really go back. and even if you do, it's not the same.


none of us were particularly excited about the trip...and that probably contributed to our surprise in experiencing the best week of our lives, together. i know Narnia wouldn't be the same if i went back, but is it possible for me to be the same in my real life? the world outside of the wardrobe?

in a way, i hope not. we were all exceptionally blessed with an indescribable week. love, joy, community, laughter, sun, friends...a little glimpse into Heaven maybe. i guess it just shows my sin... my greedy hands want more and are discontent with the blissful gift that is my home now, that is Baylor.


anyway, i miss you SB2K9. i don't know how you happened, but i'm glad you did...even though all i want to do now is listen to emo music. hopefully good will continue to come from the too good to be true week that you were.

speaking of discipline...

{from here}

woke up early this morning
for yoga with a friend.
we laid our mats on a ledge over the water
by cameron park.
a homeless man fished beside us.

we stretched & challenged our minds and bodies;
reconnected with nature,
embraced beauty.

to be disciplined is:
to focus with joy, to give up bad habits
in exchange for positive & productive ones.
it is to live a full life, to stretch and challenge oneself,
to center one's thoughts.
to celebrate lent.

i think God likes yoga.

i wish i was a hippy...

discipline

it's funny how God seems to convict you & instill ideas in you through every aspect of daily life. like when you've been thinking about one thing, and on Sunday morning that's the very topic the preacher talks about- as if he's speaking directly to you from God.

lately, God has been challenging me again and again to exercise discipline. it's my last semester at college, and senoritis keeps creeping in. why study when i can just coast? why go to class when it's perfectly sunny outside? why workout when i can hang out? well, because we are called to live responsibly, which takes discipline.

"If you are wise and understand God's ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with the humility that comes from wisdom." James 3:13


this past sunday our premarital counseling class discussed finances. talk about discipline. ross & i calculated a budget based on an estimate of my future salary...scary but really good. times will be tight, but ross always reminds me that we don't need much and that we are not of this world. i agree, i just hope we can pay the bills! our class was so enlightening though because we looked at finances from a biblical perspective, which is not always my first instinct. for example, borrowing money is absolutely not biblical. verse after verse point out why we should not do this.

"owe nothing to anyone- except for your obligation to love one another. if you love your neighbor, you will fulfill the requirements of God's law." Romans 13:8


which brings me to my biggest struggle with discipline of the week: ross and i are trying to figure out where we will live next year. with the market the way it is...it's so tempting to try to make buying a house work. whether or not we do, i am completely obsessed with our future home. not only am i fully addicted to design blogs and before-and-after pictures, but i can't stop researching terms, listings, forclosures, etc. the sooner we find a place, the sooner i can start planning how to decorate, right?



the truth is, today i am not in college station. i am still here in waco, a Baylor student involved in organizations, a community group, classes, and everything else associated with this season of life. while it's good to research, plan, and dream, i need to exercise discipline and live in the here and now.

"Look here, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we are going to a certain town and will stay there a year. We will do business and make a profit.' How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog- it's here a little while, then it's gone. What you ought to say is, 'If they Lord wants us to, we wil live and do this or that.' Otherwise, you are boating about your own plans, and all such boasting is evil." James 4:13-16

i am very excited to see where the Lord puts us all in the next year. until then, i am praying for discipline to focus on today!